Pants.

I won’t leave you hanging, promise.  Let’s talk about pants, shall we?

Well, let’s talk about shirts first.  I know, I’m such a tease.  When I had my pants-buying-extravaganza a few weeks ago, I also skeptically picked up a shirt.  This shirt.  In “Heather Blue.”  I think I got so excited about the pants, that I forgot until this week that I had also bought the shirt.  The kind of bunching action at the v-neck is groan-worthy, but the color, lightweight Spring/Summer material, and long sleeves (!) convinced me to take a chance.  To my pleasant surprise, I paired it with some khakis (still non-maternity khakis, see my wife’s “incredibly shrinking pregnant lady” post), along with my muscle undershirt (*flex*) and it was completely work-worthy and prompted not a single comment from my co-workers, who have finally gotten over their shock of the magenta sweater I’ve folded into the rotation.  I love it when a novelty wears off.  So, thumbs up for the shirt, and thumbs up for buying at least one more in another color – “Heather Oatmeal” perhaps?  Apparently, I’m suddenly my mother, who used to find one shirt/pants combination she liked, then would buy it in all available pastel colors.  God help me.

Ok – pants!  Maternity pant-wise, I’m only really wearing the maternity jeans at this point, since the khakis and other work non-maternity pants I have either work just fine the way they are, or require the whole “hair tie around the button/loop” loosening technique.  I still don’t own a belly band.  Gasp.  I’m not intentionally avoiding the new pants, and certainly now that the weather is warmer, I could stand to work them into my weekly wardrobe.

The mat-jeans of choice are these guys, though I do try to wear them without my heels on.  Har har.  A couple of weekends ago, I started wearing them, and found that my belly wasn’t big enough to hold up the full-panel, since I’d pull it up, and it would come crashing down moments later.  Last weekend, my belly seemed to have grown enough to keep it in place, but I certainly have to make sure whatever shirt I’m wearing is long enough, so that the panel/pant seam area isn’t exposed.  I suppose it’s better than walking around beltless with my underpants hanging out the back, but there is still an awful lot of “hitching.”  I could really benefit from some non-full-panel jeans, but the biggest Old Navy size doesn’t cut it, and the good folks at MM only sing praises of full-panel when it comes to my size.  Other than the constant hitching, the only other issue is not being able to tuck an undershirt inside of the panel, since it looks awkward and bunchy.  The current downside is that if the panel falls, I’m suddenly exposed.  The bottom line is – I need maternity suspenders.

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Posted on March 18, 2010, in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. 5 Comments.

  1. There WILL come a time when your belly will keep it up perfectly.

    And then it will promptly be too big to keep it up properly any longer.

    It’s such a PITA.

    • I’ll keep waiting for the magic moment when I stop having to hitch up my drawers all the time. It’s really sexy, the hitching.

      • Just wait until you’re no longer pregnant, and then have to hitch them up because you won’t fit in your old pants yet, but the maternity ones will be comically huge on you.

        (I also had disappearing body parts. And all my weight gain was baby and water – I lost 30 pounds when I gave birth and in the subsequent days. But DAMN if shit just ain’t where I left it…)

  2. I have the same jeans and am still wearing them. I don’t know if I will ever go back to regular pants.

  3. YOU ARE HILARIOUS. i love you.

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