Stretching the truth
When my band played our big show last October, we nearly sold out the place. Collectively, the bands brought out 233 people, with the club’s capacity capped at 250, at $13 a ticket. Since then, there has been some non-pregnancy related band drama (you’d never know how dramatic some grown men can be), which has taken the pressure off of my typical daily routine of seeking out shows for us to play. Initially, I figured that I could probably still play out through the end of December, banking on scheduling a holiday-time show to be our last before a long hiatus, but since the drama went down one full day after the show, I haven’t lifted a show-booking finger since. It’s easier to rationalize skipping the booking process when no one’s speaking to the drummer, as opposed to my pregnancy being the first obstacle. Here we are, nearing the end of December, and my gigging window is all but gone.
Last night, the booking agent for the club we played in October emailed me with a couple of dates available for us to play this January. My first thought? Well… hmm, I’m only just now kind of starting to show – I could probably swing it. Second thought – Wait… are those two dates Tuesdays? Screw that… Tuesdays. Third thought – Oh right, no one’s still talking to the drummer. Well hell. So there are three obvious truthful answers I could give to the booking guy when I deny the gig: a – Pregnant!, b – No Tuesdays, man, c – no drummer. Aside from b (which just makes us look like ungrateful whiny babies), both a and c could potentially scare him away from ever reaching out to us ever again to play a show. This, the man, who replies back to one in ever 100 emails you send him. Welcome to the music business, folks.
So I’m thinking of stretching the truth a little – tell him that we’re on a bit of a hiatus between now and the end of Spring. No, the end of Spring is not June, but Spring sounds so much more reasonable than end-of-June, doesn’t it? And hiatus is a little bit of pregnancy with a heavy dash of no one’s talking to the drummer, neither of which should be revealed. Hiatus could technically be seen as… one member is on sabbatical, or doing missionary work, or we’re going to spend the next few months retreating and writing songs and doing ropes courses and trust falls. We’re going to let him think band-positive thoughts, instead of this-band-is-unstable thoughts. Cause, well, appearing like you’re breaking up isn’t the best way to land shows, even if they are far off in the future.
This is a lot of mumbo jumbo that basically comes down to a life lesson for Vegas: Sometimes, it’s OK to stretch the truth, especially when it pertains to booking your band.